Beauty from Pain
by AnnCarter
Summary: After Wilson's death, House makes the one decision he's able to make. But first, he knows he must see someone he hasn't seen in a long time. (Post "Everybody Dies", obviously)


_All rights for House are David Shore's and Fox's._

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><p>When Lisa heard the doorbell rings, the last thing she expected was to find a very familiar face behind the door. She stopped in shock when she saw House standing in front of the door, unconcealed pain in his pure blue eyes. Even though she thought after more than two years her feelings for him were gone, the moment she saw him again they all came rushing back into her heart and mind.<p>

Which is why, once she managed to recover from the initial shock, the first thing she said was, "I thought I told you I don't want to see you again."

He didn't seem surprised at her reaction at all. Only later she realized he didn't seem to be able to feel anything except for pain. "Wilson is dead." His voice was quiet and emotionless, telling her just how much pain he was in at that moment. A part of her wanted to hug him while another told her to stay away from him, just like she did ever since he crashed into her house.

"I know." She paused before adding in a softer tone, "He told me you were there for him."

"Yeah." His right hand rubbed his right thigh, where his hurt muscle was. He didn't seem to even notice he did that. Only then did she realize he didn't have a cane – or any other means of supporting his leg – with him. Noticing that, she also realized he probably hadn't changed or eaten properly in the past two weeks since the funeral, seeing how dusty his leather jacket was and how skinny he seemed.

Her feelings still battling within her, she found herself asking, "What do you want, House?"

That seemed to wake him up. "I… I'm sorry," He said eventually. She stared at him, unable to conceal her surprise. "You've always… tried to help me become a better person, always given me the chance to be better, and I… I ignored it all. All I ever did was to hurt you in return. Even though I loved you more than anyone."

She stared at him, unsure what to say or how to respond, but he didn't even give her a chance to do anything.

"I was a jerk. These last few months with Wilson taught me that. He'd always given me so much and sometimes I think I don't even know why." He paused, seeming to be lost in thoughts and memories. "I hardly deserved that sometimes."

"He was your best friend." Her voice was soft now.

"He was my only friend." He looked up into her eyes, and for the first time in over two years, she felt dazzled by his look. "Anyway, I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I hope you and Rachel are happy." With those words he turned to leave, limping towards the bike by the side of the road.

"House, wait." She didn't even realize she said those words right until he stopped and turned to look at her. "You should eat something," She said eventually, as she realized she didn't even know why she stopped him.

His smile was humorless. "Maybe."

"Please."

He nodded briefly, silently thanking her for her concern, before turning away again and making his way towards his bike. She hesitated for a brief second before running forward and catching up with him just as he reached his bike, already attempting to start up the engine. The pieces finally connecting into one full picture in her mind, she grabbed his arm and asked, "You're going to kill yourself, aren't you?"

He attempted to remove her hand from his arm, but couldn't. "Just… let go." She kept looking into his eyes, her hand clutching his arm as tightly as she could. "Lisa, please."

"You come here and apologize for hurting me, and then you just run off to do that again?" She asked angrily, her green eyes burning with the inner fire he knew so well. "This apology means nothing if you're just gonna keep doing that."

"I-"

"Shut up, House." He could barely feel his arm by now, but she didn't mind. "That's what you call an apology? You don't think your first funeral was bad enough that you're gonna do that again? The only reason I didn't kill you when I saw you at the door was that Wilson told me about everything you've done for him and why you faked your death in the first place. Just because Wilson isn't here now to go through this again you think it's okay to do that?" He stared at her, truly shocked at her response. "You're thinking only about yourself again, but you come here and pretend you learned how to think about other people."

"That's-"

"In that case, I don't want that apology. It means nothing anyway, and you know it just as well as I do, even if you pretend you don't."

Understanding she wouldn't give him the chance to say anything and realizing that she still loved him, even though he thought she didn't anymore, he kissed her. It was a fierce, almost painful kiss, and to his further surprise, she responded willingly. Feeling blood on his lips, he realized she bit him, but he didn't even mind. She let go of his arm and instead wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her. Her passion and need fueled his own, right until he remembered who they were and pulled back, disengaging himself from her.

"You're a jerk."

"I know." His voice was quiet. For the first time since Wilson died, he managed to read another person's feelings, and was amazed to see just how much she still loved him, even after everything he did to her.

"I can't give you another chance, not just like that."

"I don't want you to."

She narrowed her eyes angrily. "Don't even dare joking about that."

"I'm not." She opened her mouth to speak, but he cut her off. "Every time you did it ended with me hurting you. I don't want to do this again."

"That's your solution to everything, isn't it? Running away." Her voice was rising to higher tones again, telling him how angry she really was. "I thought those months with Wilson taught you something, didn't they?"

"I'm hurt." His voice was once again quiet and emotionless. "I'm more screwed up than ever. I'm just gonna hurt you again until you decide you've had enough again."

"Then work on that," She snapped. "You're always so god telling people how screwed up they are; why don't you work on yourself for a change?" Realizing she let her anger gain control of her again, she added quietly, "The people we love are the ones who hurt us the most, but that doesn't mean we should run away from them."

He looked at her silently for a moment before asking, "Don't you think I've hurt you enough?"

"Yes." She took a deep breath. "But that doesn't mean I'm willing to let you die. Your fake death and Wilson's death were hard enough."

His hand gently touched her cheek and she looked down and closed her eyes. A few seconds later, as he felt wetness on his hand, he let go of her and hugged her, hoping to comfort her just by the touch. Slowly, she stopped crying and moved away slightly, to be able to look into his eyes.

"I'm sorry," He muttered, unable to look away from her green eyes.

"Me too."

He looked at her quietly, searching for hints as to what the future holds for them, before asking, "So now what?"

She took another deep breath before saying, "Now… you eat." She hesitated before gently pressing her lips against his, silently telling him she really did still love him.

He looked at her silently for long few seconds before nodding briefly. "Okay."


End file.
